People find love anytime; morning afternoon and evening. It may come anyhow through greetings, arguments and play. It may come anywhere including churches, lecture rooms, supermarkets, gyms, parties and conferences.
However, today one place that appears to be the centre of finding love in Ghana and globally is the office. In fact, global studies suggest more than half of all workers get emotionally involved with someone in the office.
Why love at the workplace?
Yesterday, the man was the breadwinner while the woman was the homemaker. Today, due to equal educational opportunities and interventions, Ghanaian women match men boot for boot.
It is, therefore, common to find that in most organisations there are fairly equal men and women in informal verbal and non-verbal communication. When men and women meet, sexual hormones just can’t shut down in an office or any other place.
Imagine a bank lady who leaves home at six in the morning and gets home at eight in the evening. At the weekends, she hardly finds time to clean her home and cook. Sunday is for church and rest. The workplace is where she spends most of her time. It gives her the best option to find potential lovers.
Advantages of workplace affair
You see colleagues in all moods- tense, relaxed, anxious as you do what you both enjoy. The workplace is non-threatening and comfortable. You deal with someone who is not a stranger.
You have adequate time to share and know your partner’s interests, habits and ideas better. You have breaks together and talk. Chances are great to step up your association to a romantic affair.
Disadvantages of workplace affair
Love at the workplace affects work, love or both. This may spill over to your colleagues and damage the dynamics at the workplace.
A boss may make concessions for his girlfriend at the cost of the organisation. Hiding office romance is the most difficult thing you could do in your office.
Studies show most romance at the workplace is based on erotic love which easily tapers off to leave behind pain, bitterness and jealousy.
If things go wrong and you keep seeing your former lover you may lose the motivation to work. Again, office romance without self-control can be dirty. There are many cases of lovers kissing, fondling and even having sex in the office.
Office romance without self-control can be dirty
Romance at the workplace would almost always be found out. Ridicule, gossips, can ruin your chances of progression. Colleagues may feel cheated and deliberately cause financial loss to the organisation.
One bad move by one partner will be linked to the other. It is also known that no matter how a girlfriend works hard, people will attribute her promotion to ‘bottom power’.
Today, many workplaces have become a fertile place for infidelity. Some directors offer appointments and promotion only to those who compromise.
A boss who is supposed to be working long hours in the office may actually be in a “lungu-lungu” (obscure) hotel with his secretary. This may break down family life.
Studies show only a very small fraction of workplace affair end in fulfilling relationships. Studies also indicate most workplace affair comes at a great financial and professional cost to lovers.
These show workplace affair may not be good for you because you may lose more than you gain.
Have you found love at the workplace?
You can’t prevent someone from having a crush on you at the workplace. Sometimes, you can’t help falling for an office colleague. First, admit what is happening and then make a decision.
If you decide not to get involved, take it off your mind. Stop working or taking breaks together.
You must also avoid discussing personal difficulties in your relationship. A man may get close just to help you because men are born with an instinct to help women. Things may push to higher levels and get you confused.
If you decide to go in for workplace affair because love works in mysterious ways;
• Find out the policies and restrictions at the workplace so that you avoid improper or embarrassing consequences. Some places strictly forbid workplace affair.
• Be honest with yourself and make sure you are not in for personal benefit to ease tension or cover up difficulties at home
• Ensure that you are professional about work and romance. Try to keep the affair secret. Don’t use the time for work for romance, e-mails and notes. Also, maintain a good friendship with your colleagues.
It is advisable not to change your habit at the workplace. A significant change in routine like frequent visit to your boss or lover may annoy your colleagues. Avoid getting too close or attending social gatherings together.
It is important you don’t change lovers at the workplace. Two affairs at your workplace may be one too many to maintain your integrity and reputation.
The good and the bad of office romance
Love may be hot to handle. You meet this beautiful lady at the workplace. She has all the qualities you want in a future wife. You genuinely love her and the chemistry is right.
What do you do? Well, happiness comes from work and love. For some, the office could be the place to live life to the fullest and where dreams come true.
Romance can happen at any time anywhere and with anyone. Happily, studies show office romance doesn’t carry the same stigma it did a generation ago but it could destroy your image and work.
Therefore, if you find love at the workplace and neither of you is taken, gratefully accept it, but drive with care.